As the saying goes, “Nobody’s perfect.”
And truly, nobody is perfect. We all have our insecurities in one way or another.
The difference between people when it comes to insecurities is this:
some recognize theirs and work on them,
some recognize theirs and accept them,
while others identify them but still live feeling insecure.
So, let me ask you — which of these categories do you fall into?
Don’t settle with your insecurities — work on them. The people you look up to as “perfect” also had insecurities, but they chose to grow through them. They worked on themselves until they became bold, confident, and the version of themselves you now admire.
Do you know one thing about insecurities?
They’re stumbling blocks to your purpose. They make you feel small, keep you from reaching your goals, and whisper lies about your worth.
They shrink your personality.
They make you timid.
They turn you into a mediocre version of yourself and quietly kill your self-esteem.
A Little Backstory About Myself
I started struggling with insecurities at a very tender age — around ten.
I used to wonder why I didn’t look a certain way. My elder brother would casually make comments about my body, jokingly of course, but he didn’t realize he was planting seeds of insecurity in me.
I didn’t like my hooded eyelids. I’d sit beside my twin sister while she slept, admiring her beautiful eyelids and wishing mine were like hers. (Haha… so funny now, but not so funny back then.)
I didn’t overcome my insecurities overnight. It took time — I finally overcame them at fifteen, when I began to truly see how beautiful I was, inside and out.
What helped?
One of my mom’s cousins came visiting, and she noticed how hurt I got whenever my brother made jokes about me. Each time he said something hurtful, she’d counter it with something kind.
She’d say things like,
“Ajuma, you’re beautiful.”
“Your body is gold.”
“Do you know how many ladies out there would love to have a stomach as flat as yours?”
Those words stuck with me. I didn’t believe them at first (I was only twelve or thirteen then) but when I turned fifteen, those words started replaying in my head.
Each time I caught myself feeling insecure, I’d hear her voice again. Slowly, I began to accept her words. I started believing them. And once I did, I began to receive and accept compliments from others too.
That acceptance — that mindset shift — was what helped me overcome my insecurities.
So, How Do You Overcome Yours?
You might be wondering, “Okay, that’s your story. But how do I overcome my own insecurities?”
Well, it’s as simple as A-B-C.
A — Identify Your Insecurities
You probably already know what they are. But still, dig deeper.
There are times we feel a certain way about ourselves but don’t realize it’s insecurity — we just think “that’s how I am.”
Take time to reflect. Be honest with yourself.
Naming your insecurities is the first step to taking away their power.
B — Accept Yourself for Who You Are
What exactly are you insecure about? Your body? Your voice? Your background?
Understand that there are different body types, personalities, and paths in life. God formed you intentionally — with purpose, precision, and uniqueness.
Your body type, your skin tone, your height — everything about you was designed to fit into your divine purpose.
You’re special. You’re unique. You’re beautiful.
The Creator was intentional while creating you.
So instead of comparing, start accepting.
C — Work on Yourself
Self-acceptance doesn’t mean you stop growing. It means you love yourself enough to improve where needed.
Work on your mindset. Replace those negative thoughts with positive, truth-based affirmations about who you are in God’s light.
Work on yourself physically.
- If acne scars make you feel insecure, see a dermatologist.
- If your weight is affecting your confidence, start exercising or eating better.
- If you struggle with self-expression, practice speaking up more.
It’s not vanity — it’s self-improvement.
D — Learn to Accept Compliments
This one’s huge.
When someone says, “You look beautiful today,” don’t argue it in your head. Say thank you and believe it.
Compliments help build confidence. The more you accept them, the more you begin to see yourself the way others see you.
So, start smiling and saying “thank you” when people appreciate you. You deserve it.
E — Act Like You’re Already There
Even when you’re not fully confident yet, carry yourself like someone who is.
Someone once told me,
“The way you see and carry yourself is the way people will see and carry you.”
If you act timid, people will sense it. But if you walk with quiet confidence, even when you’re scared, people will perceive you as confident.
Confidence isn’t pretending to be perfect — it’s choosing to show up despite your imperfections.
So, stand tall. Speak up. Smile. Carry yourself like the masterpiece you are.
Bonus Tip and to me, the most important. Learn to see yourself the way God sees you, understand who you are in Christ, Talk to him about everything and the way you feel about yourself, He’ll show you how special you are to Him.
And honestly this can only be done when you spend time with Him. You get so consumed in His presence that you begin to see you the way He sees you,.
Be Patient With Yourself
Overcoming insecurities doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time, patience, and a whole lot of self-love.
Be gentle with yourself in the process.
Keep showing up.
Keep speaking kindly to yourself.
Consistency and patience are key in transforming how you see yourself.
And remember, even the most confident person you know once battled the same doubts you’re facing now.
So, breathe. You’re doing just fine.
Keep working on yourself — and watch how you evolve into the confident version of you that you were always meant to be.
If this helped you, share it with someone who needs to read it. And don’t forget to drop your thoughts below — I’d love to know which of these steps you’ll start practicing today!
